BIble Wars

(A Take off of Stuff Christians Like)

We have all been in a Bible discussion when a scripture war breaks out. We trade verses that prove our points in hope that we will somehow prove the other person wrong and that they will convert to our way of thinking. The problem is that at the end there is no defined winner. It is like the presidential debates both sides return to their corners and they think and spin how they won. So we need a scoring system to help us be able to declare a winner. So the following is my proposed scoring system:

Old Testament Verses +3pts

New Testament Verses +2pts

Bonus points for:

Quoting it from the KJV or ASV +2pt

Levitical Law +2pts

Minor Prophet excluding Jonah +2pts

Giving book chapter and verse +2pts

Proof texting to prove your point +2pts

Red letter verses +3pts

Verses quoted in New Testament +3pts

From God +3pts

Referring to the Holy Spirit +3pts

Verses from Revelation +3pts

Verses that you can illustrate or explain with a scene from a movie +3pts

Verses that refer to some obscure practice that now brings out the junior high reaction in all of us (Examples: Ezekiel 23:19-20 and Deuteronomy 23:1) +5pts

List of all the things that will send you to hell +5pts

Penalty points for:

Verses from VBS stories -3pts

Verses found on a sign at a football game, a Thomas Kincaid picture, a coffee mug, etc -3pts

Quoting it from the Message -2pts

Quoting an evil person -3pts

Being caught proof texting to prove your point -4pts

Verses that are a common song -5pts

Thinking it was in the Bible but its not (cleanliness is next to godliness) -10pts

So no you know the rules and have a way to know if you won or lost your latest Bible discussion.

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One response to “BIble Wars”

  1. Kari says :

    Rusty..I had to laugh at this but in all honesty it is sad that sometimes “real” christians (we know and love) seem to have a score sheet of things just like this… great post it does make you think..

    Sometimes I know our relationship with Christ gets lost and it is more about who can be better at keeping score and getting it all right!

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